To the flowers of the garden of my life!
My dear ones, your presence, like the rain of God’s mercy, freshened the garden of my heart and gave my life a new meaning; May my paternal greetings and prayers accompany you forever.
My dears!
I am writing this letter after almost two years away from you. You were deprived of your father’s warm embrace and I have not been able to see my beauty queens. Sometimes you may ask ‘why is our father far away from us and why did he leave us alone?’
My dears!
This distance is very difficult for me too. There is not a moment I don’t think about you and worry about your present and future. I loved to watch you grow up moment by moment and stare at your beautiful and innocent faces. I made sense of my life in the frame of your penetrating eyes; But now, with regret, emigration is my constant companion!
There are reasons for this distance and migration. First is the presence of the ignorant, misguided and cruel sect called Taliban, who have taken Afghanistan and its people hostage. The same woolly, old-fashioned group that does not allow girls and women to study and go to school and university, the same group that deprived you of your most basic human rights. These oppressions and deprivations add to your father’s worries day by day. Being oppressed as a girl is painful.
It is hard for a father to see ignorant people steal his daughters’ childhoods and not let them live their lives as children should.
I regret that you have been banned from going to parks, sports, and travel as well as being deprived of education. Sometimes you are even prevented from entering health centers. All these tragedies hurt my body and soul.
Another reason is something that I never wanted to tell you, that I hoped would be eradicated before you were born or grew up. But that didn’t happen. It is the tyranny against us as the Hazara ethnic minority. It has been like this for a long time. Sometimes the rhetoric fell quieter, but it never went away. The Taliban group in particular has a long-standing grudge against the Hazara people. They think if they kill the Hazaras, they will be loved by God. Throughout history, the most severe tortures and atrocities have been committed against our ancestors and fathers, from murder, torture, and slavery to usurpation of lands and displacement. I am very sorry and sad that today you have also witnessed and been caught in such a hateful matter and once again the fate of our ancestors has been visited on us and our lives have been torn apart.
The light my eyes!
You need to be familiar with our history and what has been done to us, especially from the time of Abdul Rahman Khan’s rule and the massacres he carried out until the time of the Taliban regime and even during the republican period, when they did not value us at all. Bloodshed and lawsuits remained unanswered and our women, girls, fathers and brothers watered the soil of Afghanistan with their pure blood. However, I urge you to never feel discouraged, just as the survivors and heirs of our martyrs continued to progress after every painful event. They refused to accept humiliation. Rather than stopping, they sprouted again and stunned the world.
My dears!
Since you are a Hazara and a Shiite, don’t feel disappointed. The Hazara identity has always been peaceful and a source of pride. You should be proud that you belong to a hardworking, diligent, honest and courageous people.
I never thought of leaving my country, my family and you, my beautiful girls; But unfortunately, all of this happened in the blink of an eye leaving me and others like me far away from our homes. Your father’s thoughts were not and are not compatible with the Taliban’s thoughts and beliefs. I knew more or less their thinking and rules; But as each day passes and their oppressive prohibitions intensify, my faith in them has not changed. It has become even clearer that I had to leave my homeland and my loved ones. Please don’t be upset by your father. It was such a difficult decision to make because every moment you are away, a year passes for me. I brought myself to the land of exile in the hope of providing you with a better future and a life with mental and emotional peace.
Ah! I wish I could do something for each of my children and to all girls of your age. I wish I could be a beacon for all those hopeful eyes made tired by those miserable conditions. I wish all the girls of my land, especially the deprived and oppressed Hazaras, could be here to taste real life and enjoy all their rights freely. To live happily and not fear the patriarchal oppressors.
My angels!
Your father is in a financially poor family; But in terms of dignity and honor, he grew up rich. Economic problems made me go to Kabul and work in the government of Ashraf Ghani, which did not have any useful plans for our people (Hazaras). I and several others actually played the role of burnt wood there. However, I always tried to be right and help all people, even in a small way. With the experience I gained, I want to ensure that don’t have to worry about money so you are not compelled to work somewhere you don’t like.
With these explanations, I hope you don’t condemn me for escaping and staying away from you. This father’s only happiness is his beloved daughters, who love you as much as all the hardships he has faced. It is good for you that you are still young and living in your childhood. You don’t have our adult understanding yet, and this is the source of a father’s joy and happiness. I hope that by the time you reach your teenage years, all these dark days will be over and I will see you healthy and happy and walking the steps of success.
Dears!
I have always tried to make sure that you are happy and live free and away from prejudice and hatred and do not notice the miserable situation of a society like Afghanistan. But since my Zainab is six years old and has started school, and my Zahra is going to kindergarten, and my beloved Zahra is still in her childhood, I want you to know and remember that your father will always love you more than anything and everything. Someone in this world has loved you and will love you. In my eyes, nothing is superior to you. As you grow, I ask you to search for the truth that happiness is within you. Find happiness within yourself and keep it. Love each other and believe in yourself. Put kindness at the top of your life and be compassionate towards your fellow human beings.
Pursue big goals and leave your worries to God. You should not be disappointed that man is alive with hope and life can be better spent with positive thoughts and hope.
You don’t need to look for someone to be happy, remember you have to love yourself first, then others. Respect your rights first, then the rights of others. Do not wait or ask anyone to love you and be loved.
I want you to be the creator of your pure and happy moments. Life is just passing moments, so breathe, live and enjoy every second of it.
I want you to be the creator of your pure and happy moments. Life is just passing moments, so breathe, live and enjoy every second of it.
My daughters!
You were born to be happy, to love and to cherish. Your smile is the miracle of life. You are the miracle of my life. Never withhold your beautiful smiles from yourself, your parents and all those who love you dearly.
I hope these days will pass as soon as possible and we will not forget this great lesson that nothing is permanent. This dark period of our current era will pass and the rule of the Taliban will pass and what will remain is humanity and kindness.
I love you all!
From the father’s side: Nasrullah Sadiqi
July/27/2023
Canada
“Letter To My Daughter” is an opportunity to write about how life has changed for women and girls under the de facto rule of the Taliban. You are invited to share your account through the format of a letter of how you navigate life under the Taliban. Write about what you experience at home, outside the home, or simply inside yourself.
